I found myself happy today. Happy for no reason at all.
It felt so strange to feel happy. It has been so long. It's been so long since I smiled for no reason at all. And today I did.
I feel like I won today!!
I knew I needed a break. But I don't think I realized how bad. I thought about the last 5 months today, and I decided, I have without a doubt been walking around in a fog. An IF induced fog. Everything I am. Everything has revolved around IF. Until now.
I have not seen my RE since Sept 24. It feels good to not think about wandings, or injections or the next cycle, or insurance.
Don't get me wrong, it's still there. I am a changed person, a new person forever.
But today I realized I can still be happy.
What a great feeling, Jess! It is so incredible to be able to "come up for air" and realize how much life has to offer. I found my forced breaks to be so helpful. I am hoping to hear about more continued happiness from you, you deserve it :)
ReplyDeleteWelcome back, Jes - so glad that you are feeling a sense of relief with your break. You deserve it, girl.
ReplyDeleteCheers to happiness!
XOXO